I’ve always been curious about strip clubs. And everyone knows curiosity killed the cat.
When I and my friend left a club early on a Friday night, she turned to me and said, “We should go to ***** *****, see what it’s like.” I was the curious cat, and I didn’t want the curiosity to kill me, so I went.
I was the curious cat, and I didn’t want the curiosity to kill me, so I went.
Getting money out of the bank to pay the entry fee she laughs, “I’m using money from my dad’s card so he can’t find out about this.” Hilarious. Walking up to the intimidating black door, well I say walking but the bottle of Prosecco, wine at VIP and numerous vodka & lemonades made me feel like I was on Jupiter.
The man at the door was nice, though. He made me give him my full attention (probably due to the fact that he was from Wales, like me).
Nicole reaches for her money and pays first, which makes me wonder if she’s a bit drunker than me. Maybe I am drunker than her – I don’t entirely know.
“£10 girls.” Chirps the man behind the till. Nicole replies, “do you do student discount?” As a joke. He’s laughing. Student discount. In a strip club. Hilarious.
Come On In
Strutting in like Tyra Banks and Heidi Klum, we go straight to the bar. Two shots of tequila – this is what we need for Dutch courage, so two shots are what we’ll get. Nice price too, £9.50. £9.50!
I chuck back the liquid and my face doesn’t even scrunch up in despair, proving my drunkness. Licking the salt off my hand like a golden retriever, I squish the lime between my teeth. Tasty.
After buying ourselves a drink each, we sit down.
First, we’re stopped by a wall of two ladies in lingerie who say they’ll give us a special dance if we want one. We say, “we’ll let you know”, even though we know that we wouldn’t be letting them know anytime soon. We smirk and sit down at a table.
Along comes a woman in lingerie with Auburn hair, staring at the pole she’s about to devote herself to. Men crowd in their suits with their drinks, watching as she takes the small stage. Swinging her legs around the pole, she climbs up, bends backwards and takes off her bra at the same time. She’s selling her soul to the pole.
All I can hear is the clinking of drinks, wedding rings on a number of fingers being the reason for the clinking. I highly doubt that any of these middle-aged men are married to one of the dancers.
Sat down, the security guard whose job it is to check that everybody is conforming to the rules (no touching, no filming, no phones) keeps sitting down next to me. Excluding the fact he has slept with over 300 women, so he says, we speak about the club and how it is actually respectful, in terms of the rules and exclusivity.
My eyes are blurring, my heads fuzzy, however, I’m enjoying my ice cold drink and laughing with Nicole over “why we came here in the first place.”
A dancer sits down next to me. She looks amazing, smells even better, and asks me where I’m from. “Do you want a private dance for £25?” she asks. I nod my head, although she continues by saying, “you’re not to worry about paying by card. The name of the club doesn’t show on bank statements.” I decline politely.
As we are here for the experience and all, Nicole says, “we are waiting for one of the girls to finish work.”
We indulge in the sexy atmosphere and its people until we decide to leave before overstaying our welcome.
I can say that I have experienced the steamy, seductive scene of ‘the strip club’, but that will be it. Until I go to Vegas or something.
Thanks for reading! Have you been to a place that’s surprised you?