I’ve always been curious about strip clubs. And everyone knows curiosity killed the cat.
When me and my friend left a club early on a Friday night, she turned to me and said, “We should go to ***** *****, see what it’s like.” I was the curious cat, and I didn’t want the curiosity to kill me, so I went.
Getting money out of the bank to pay the entry fee she laughed, “I’m using money from my dad’s card so he can’t find out about this.” Hilarious. Walking up to the intimidating black door, well I say walking but the bottle of Prosecco, wine at VIP and numerous vodka & lemonades made me feel like I was on Jupiter. The man at the door was nice though, and made me give him my full attention (he was from Wales, like me).
Nicole was the one to reach for her money and pay first, making me realise she was a bit more drunk than I was. But that could be a lie. “£10 girls.” The man behind his till chirped, to which Nicole replied “do you do student discount?” As a joke, making him burst into laughter. I still find the fact she asked fucking hilarious. Student discount. In a strip club.
Strutting in like Tyra Banks and Heidi Klum, we went straight to the bar. Two shots of tequila was what we needed for Dutch courage, and two shots are what we got. Nice price too, coming to £9.50.. I chucked back the liquid without my face even scrunching up, proving how drunk I was. Licked the salt off my hand like a golden retriever, and squished the lime between my teeth. Tasty.
After buying ourselves a drink each, we went to sit down. We were stopped first though, by a wall of two ladies in lingerie telling us they’ll give us a special dance, if we want one. Telling them “we’ll let you know” even though we knew that we wouldn’t be letting them know anytime soon, we smirked and sat down on a table.
Along comes a woman in lingerie with Auburn hair, staring at the pole she’s about to devote herself to. Men crowd in their suits with their drinks, watching her take the small stage. Swinging her legs around the pole, she climbs up it and bends backwards, taking off her bra at the same time. She sold her soul to that pole.
All I could hear was the clinking of drinks, wedding rings on a number of fingers being the reason for the clinking. Highly doubt they were married to any of the dancers. Sat down, the security guard who’s job was to check that everybody was conforming to the rules (no touching, no filming, no phones) kept sitting down next to me. Excluding the fact he has slept with over 300 women, we spoke about the club and how it is actually respectful, in terms of the rules and exclusivity.
My eyes are blurring, my heads fuzzy, but I’m enjoying my ice cold drink and laughing with Nicole over “why we have come here.” A dancer sits down next to me. She looks amazing, smells even better, asks me where I’m from and if I want a “private dance for £25” and “not to worry about paying by card, as the clubs name doesn’t show on bank statements.” Politely declining, being there for the experience and all, Nicole said “we are waiting for one of the girls to finish work.”
Sorry, but this man is who I want a lap dance off.
After drinking in the sexy atmosphere and its people, it was more than time to leave. I can say that I have experienced the steamy, seductive scene of ‘the strip club’, but that will be it. Until I go to Vegas.
Thanks for reading! Have you been to a place that’s surprised you?